I Believe You
by lillybug991
Summary: Elliot walks in and catches Olivia, but its not what he thinks. Does he believe her?


_Sorry for not updating in a little while, I am going through a struggling time. _

**This is a different story for me normally I don't write from different POV's but I decided to give it a try. And for all of you who are waiting for an update on Undercover Love, I am working on it, I am. It's just that my mood affects my writing, and at the moment I am not in the best moods, and I don't want it to spoil that story. And I want to thank all of you who read my stories and then take the time to let me know what you think of them!**

_XOXO_

**-_Lilly_**

* * *

><p>Here I am standing at her door, knocking for the upteenth time in five mintues. What is she doing? Sure they just finished a very bad case, but surly she wouldnt do anything drastic? "Olivia!" I tried and knocked on the door but still got nothing, maybe I should just use my key?<p>

...

I just want to wash away the day, I slowly ran the bar of vanilla soap along my leg. The water was starting to cool, there was no telling how long I have been in here, but when I first got in it was scorching hot. I set the soap down on the side of the tub before leaning back, that's when I heard knocking, I rolled my eyes knowing it was Elliot. God help her me love him, but he was the worst when it came to space. Do I even want space?

I think the only thing that I want right now is for him to hold me, but then again wouldnt he rather be holding his wife? I quickly pushed the thought out of my head as I submerged my entire body under the water. I normally don't do this, but it felt like it was the only thing that could take the pain away. It is almost physically impossible to drown yourself, its your body's reflex to jump up and breath. So surely she wasn't intending to drown, she just wanted to wash it all away.

….

I used my key and push the door open, maybe I should call her name again so that if she was like asleep I wouldnt be intruding. "Liv?" But I still got nothing, what could she be doing? Was she even home? Well of course she was, I followed her and then sat outside. I don't think that I remember her leaving. I started to make my way to her room, when I heard the soft noise of splashing water, and I immediately thought the worst.

….

I heard him come in and faintly call my name but for some reason I couldn't bring myself to sit up. I could hear the sound of his footsteps echoing off the porcelain walls of the bathtub, and all that her body would do was allow her to close her eyes. I wonder what is running through his mind? All of the sudden I heard my bathroom door bust open, but all that I could do was lay there with my eyes closed. I know that he was thinking that I was dead because I could hear the the gasp that fell from his lips.

….

"Oh god, Liv," he said running over to her and snatching her out of the water, he heard her gasp and choke for air, and he let out a sigh of relief. He just watched her as she tried to catch her breath, he was still holding her shoulders. So many things were running through his mind and instead of being calm and asking her what was wrong he got mad. "What the hell, Olivia!?"

"What are you doing here?" She asked him, as she pulled herself out of his grasp and pulled her knees up to her chest to hide her naked vulnerable self from his view.

"I came see if you were alright! Good thing that I decided to come in when I did!" He said jerking up, even though he was slightly pissed at her, he was still had respect for her. "Here," he said handing her a towel before turning around.

"Wow, thanks," she said sarcastically, catching the towel as it landed half in the water and half in the floor. "You really are so kind."

She stood up and wrapped the towel around her shivering body before letting the water out, then just standing there staring at his back.

"Olivia what were you thinking?" He asked her, still not looking at her. She could hear the pain in his voice and she knew that no matter what she was going to say he wouldnt believe her.

"I wasn't," she said with a sigh. "But I wasnt doing what you think that I was."

"We need to talk," he said walking out of the bathroom and sitting on her bed, waiting for her. She went to follow him but forgot she was only in a towel so she just stood in the doorway. "Sit down."

"I am going to get dressed," she said walking back into the bathroom, she was about to shut the door when his foot stopped it. "What?!" She snapped.

"I don't think that letting you shut the door is the best idea," he said, and it was true he had no idea what she was capable.

"Your fucking kidding right!?" She snapped, she went to push him out of the way when he grabbed her wrist and held it to his chest, she let out a sigh and stopped pushing him. "So what you are just going to stand there and watch me?"

"No of course not," he said, did she really think that he was just going to invade her privacy. "I'll be in your room, just please leave the door open?" She sighed but nodded knowing that no matter what she did he wasn't going to let her close the door.

"Fine."

….

I got dressed in a comfortable pair of short and a t-shirt. I was combing my hair when my eyes started to water. What the hell is wrong with me? I let out a deep sigh and started to brush my teeth. God only knows what he is thinking about me. But more important what am I thinking about me? Did I try and kill myself?

….

Did she try to kill herself? The thought just will not leave my mind. Surly enough I would have seen signs if she was becoming suicidal, and this case wasn't even that bad. She certainly has been through worse. Maybe everything was just catching up with her? I know she isn't going to tell me what is going on, she has been so distant lately. I have barely even talked to her lately, if it wasn't about the case. A few hey's, and how was your night. Other than that, it was all work.

Maybe she was showing signs I was just to caught up in my stupid problems to notice? Here I am blaming myself when it was my fault. Maybe she tried to kill herself because she wasnt getting attention?

….

I didn't try and kill myself I just don't know how to explain it, but I know that I didn't kill myself. Because I don't want to die, I am fine. Why fine? Why is that my go to word? I mean, I am not great, I am not super happy, but I am not sad, or depressed and certainly not suicidal. That is just ridiculous. I spit into the sink and wiped the tears that had managed to roll down my face away, before I stared at the door.

….

I heard her turn the water off and I expected her to walk through the doorway, but I didn't see her. What was she doing? I jumped up and and ran into the bathroom to see that she was just standing there in front of the sink, watching me, or was watching the door.

"What are you doing?" I asked her, I could see that her face was slightly red and I knew that she was crying I could also see that there was tear trails down her face.

"I didn't try and kill myself," she whispered, and I heard her voice crack it completely killed me. But something inside of me believed her.

"I know Liv," I replied walking over to her, she stood straighter and she started walking towards me as well, and we met in the middle of her bathroom just standing there.

….

I just wanted him to hold me, I wanted him to hold me and tell me that everything was going to be alright. That I had nothing to worry about, and that he was always going to be here for me and that he loved me. But that would all be lie wouldnt it? He loved his wife he goes home to her every night, and sure enough she wasn't stupid and would try and kill herself like me. Wait, what?

….

"Oh god," Olivia gasped bringing her hand to her mouth, and decided that being close to Elliot wasn't a great idea so she stepped back.

"Liv what is it?" Elliot asked stepping towards her, he was moments from pulling her into his embrace but then she stepped away.

"Maybe I did," she said, looking down. Had she really stooped so low that she was just going to 'eat her gun'?

"Did what?" Elliot asked confused. "Liv, did what?" He asked again when she didn't reply.

"Maybe I did," she repeated and choked on the small sob that had unconsciously left her throat. "I mean if you think I did, then sure enough everyone else would. I was just tired I only wanted to wash everything away," she started to just blurt everything thing out.

"Liv, slow down," he said, he walked over to her and was about to touch her arm when her whole entire body jerked out of his reach.

"Don't," she whispered, her actions and words betraying how she was feeling. Right now she wanted him to hold her, but the harsh reality hit her, when tonight was over she would be alone again.

"Let's go to your room," he suggested and she nodded walking out and sitting down on the end of her bed. "Now Liv, what are you talking about when you said you maybe you did?" He asked as he carefully sat down beside her.

"Do you think that I tried to kill myself?" She asked, looking at her hands, she couldn't bring herself to make eye contact.

"Do I think that you what?"

"Elliot," she said, his name slipping off her lips, she didn't want to say it. "Do you think, do you." She stopped. "I can't," she paused and cleared her throat. "I can't say it," she said and the last part came out in a harsh whisper.

"Olivia," he said taking her hands in his and tilting her head so that she had no choice but to look him in the eyes. "No, I don't think that you tried to kill yourself. I would have noticed if I knew you were capable of this. And by the way that you can't even bring yourself to say it, just proves to me that you didnt."

"Then why did you make me leave the door open?" She asked him, she believed him and he almost made her want to believe him, but something in her was still stopping her from believing it.

"I wasn't thinking," he said, running a hand down his face. "Or maybe I was thinking too much, Liv I was scared. I didn't know what to do," he said looking her deeply in the eyes. "I can't do this without you."

She looked down again, ashamed that she had made him feel like this. She didn't mean to, she honestly just wanted him to leave, she didn't want him to come inside.

"But Liv, when you said that you didn't," he paused. "Liv look at me," he said, but she shook her head. He got down in the floor in front of her forcing her to look at him. "Liv I believe you."

"But I don't," she whispered, almost choking on the words.

"Oh Liv," he said he stood up and pulled her up with him and finally wrapped his arms around her. "Liv, you are a cop the best cop in all of New York, you have helped so many people. They love you Liv, and I know that you wouldnt just leave them alone like this. And I know that deep down inside of you, you know that I love you and you love me. I certainly hope that you wouldn't just leave me like this," he whispered kissing the top of her head.

"I do," she whispered. "I really do." She squeezed him tighter. "I'm sorry."

"I know," he replied. "I know, Liv." He said holding her tighter. "Its late why don't we get you into bed."

….

This was what Olivia was waiting for, he was going to leave her. She was going to sit all alone, while he was surrounded by loving people.

"Fine," I said pulling myself out of his arms. "Goodnight," she said hoping that he would take this as his cue to leave.

"What?" He asked, and she could see that he was slightly pissed but she was angry.

"What do you mean what? I am going to bed, you should to, tell Kathy I said hi," I said, and I knew that it probably hurt him, but he is hurting me.

….

"So thats what this is about?" He asked when he realized what she was talking about, he watched her as she pulled back her bed covers.

"I don't know what you are talking about," she said fraying stupid. "I am going to bed."

"Good, I am too," he said walking over to the other side and pulling the covers back as well.

"Uh," Olivia started confused. "Shouldn't you be going home, and you know getting in bed with your wife?" She asked him, what the hell was he doing.

"Liv, I am not married," he said, and instantly her eyes darted to his finger and sure enough there was no ring.

"What the fuck?! When did that happen?" She asked now she was even angrier, how could he not tell her! She said down in her spot of the bed and pulled the blanket up to her waist.

"Liv I was officially divorced last month," he said getting into bed beside her and laying on his side and looking up at her.

"So what you think just because you are divorced and I am vulnerable, that I am just going to let you in my bed?" She asked him, she looked down at him and had to admit he was the cutest thing that she had ever seen. Her insides were flipping all around, she had Elliot Stabler in her bed in nothing but a pair of boxers.

"Well you haven't kicked me out yet," he said with a smirk. "And even if you did, I am not leaving you alone." As soon as he said this her eyes went wide.

"Oh," she said, so even though he said that he believed her, he still wasn't going to leave her alone.

"Not like that Liv," he said, he sat up and looked her in the eyes. "I believe you. I am just not going to leave you alone because I know that you don't want to be alone."

"You do?" She asked, and they both heard her voice crack, and she looked down again. "I'm sorry, I sound so weak," she said as she let out a pained chuckle.

"Liv, lay down," Elliot said scooting back so that she could. She gave him a strange look but did as he said and slid down the bed so that she was laying on her back with the blankets up to her stomach. She had both of her arms draped over her stomach, she closed her eyes when she felt him start to move. "Come here," he said and pulled her so that half of her body was laying over his. "Liv, I am not going anywhere because I know that you don't want me to leave."

"I don't," she agreed, as buried her face in the crook of his neck. "I really don't."

"And I will not go anywhere," he said running his fingers through her hair. "I am so sorry Liv."

"Why?" She asked, what did he have to be sorry for?

"Liv I wasnt here for you when you needed me, I was too busy with Kathy's stupid drama, to see that you were in pain," he said.

"I wasn't in pain," she whispered, even though she was she wasn't going to let him take the blame for it so the only thing that she could think to do was lie.

"Liv, I know you were in pain I could see it in your eyes when you let today," he said. "Thats why I followed you."

"You followed me?" She asked, she went to sit up but the warmth of his body told her otherwise, so she laid back down.

"I did, and I am glad that I did or else you would be all alone, and I would be sitting outside all alone."

"I guess."

"You guess?" He asked with a small chuckle, she could feel his entire body shake when he laughed and felt his hand in her hair slow down.

"I have missed you," she said softly, running her hand down his naked torso, she smiled when she felt goosebumps form. "So much."

"Liv, I was never gone," he said, almost shivering from her touch.

"What happened to us?" She asked him, as she laid her hand down on his stomach just feeling his warmth.

"What do you mean?" He asked confused.

"We used to do everything together, we would go to movies, out to eat. You would come over after hard days or a fight with Kathy and we would talk," she said. "I think thats what I miss the most, when you would come over and we would eat till we almost blew up!" She said laughing a little. "Then we would talk."

"I miss it too," he said, and he did, sometime he would lie and say that him and Kathy got in a fight just so he could stay there. He couldn't count the times that he had done that. "I miss you." He kissed the top of her head. "And us not talking will never happen again, I am yours, I don't have to go home to Kathy. I don't have to lie and say that I had a bad day to see you, because I will already be with you. Because I love you Olivia Benson."

….

Did he really just say that to me?

….

"I uh," Olivia choked out.

"Liv you don't have to say anything," Elliot said sitting up with her and putting his hand on her cheek. "I just want you to know, I am sick of you thinking that no one loves you."

She looked at him, she blinked and a tear rolled down her cheek. He was right though, there were times that she felt as if she were all alone that no one loved her that there was no point. But somewhere in her she knew that he loved her.

They both sat there in a comfortable silence, till Olivia did the only thing that she could think of, she kissed him. It wasn't feverishly, it wasn't rushed, it was soft. There was no tongue, it was just so simple that it was breath taking. His hand that was on her cheek went to her hair and he softly tangled his fingers in it, as his other hand rested on her now uncovered thigh.

"Elliot," Olivia mumbled against his lips, and he pulled back but there were still face to face, their noses barely touching. "I love you too."

And then he attached his lips back to hers.

**_The End..._**

_This should allow your minds to wander!_

_I hope that you like it!_


End file.
